Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
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