Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
