Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Randomize
