Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
