no you cant smoke seaweed
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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