i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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