I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
