So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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