i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Randomize
