No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
lets start a swedish sibling band together
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Randomize
