You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
