i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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