Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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