i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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