You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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