I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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