I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
