census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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