were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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