Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
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