how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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