Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
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