There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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