are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
