kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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