check it out our google latitudes are spooning
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
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