so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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