is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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