My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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