I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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