My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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