no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
My life is pants optional.
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