You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
