so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize