im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
