remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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