The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
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