he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
