well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Randomize
