i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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