Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
It's never too late to be topless.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
