i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
