I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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