Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
