Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
