do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
