My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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