worst night to have a conscience
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Randomize