Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
He has the fingertips of a God
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