i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize