why didn't you poke me back
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
